Happy New Year, everyone. I’m as unqualified to make predictions as the next guy, but I’ve decided to have a go anyway. Here are my predictions for the new year:
In 2013, An Editor Will Read My Novel
Yes, I’m still on submission. The pins and needles are beginning to dull after so much waiting. Good thing I have a bed to be depressed in.
In 2013, I Will Win the Nobel Prize in Physics
I figured out the formula for winning (see my previous post), and added rainbows and unicorns for good measure. How can I lose?
In 2013, A Heretofore Unknown Asteroid Will Pass Within Geosynchronous Orbit
Yeah, I’m going out on a limb on this one. Still, this happens more often than most people think. Sure, it’s not as likely as me winning a Nobel Prize, but it’s a bet I’m willing to take.
In 2013, Climate Change Deniers Will NOT Change Their Minds Even After Bursting Into Flames
Speaking of safe bets…
In 2013, I Will Win the Nobel Prize in Literature
I do have a book on submission, so it’s safe to say I’m in the running. Or at least that I will be in the running once an editor reads it. And wants it.
Of course, making predictions is easy. Making accurate predictions is another matter. To be fair, let’s see how I did with last year’s predictions:
In 2012, I Will Get A New Bed To Be Depressed In While I Wait For An Editor To Read My Novel
Nailed it. Well, technically speaking, the bed isn’t actually new. But I did change the sheets last year.
In 2012, A Single Asteroid Will Knock Out All Our Communications Satellites Like Dominoes
My television reception in September was a bit spotty, so I’m calling this prediction a winner. That’s the way science works, right?
In 2012, I Will Overdose On Nacho Cheese-Flavored Doritos
It didn’t happen, but not for lack of trying. Maybe I’ll have better luck this year.
In 2012, I Will Open A Coffee Shop
Nailed it. Hey, maybe I should blog about that? Do you think?